April 10, 2014

Gotta bad case of The Gottas? How to let it all … go.

“What are we going to do if the online high school doesn’t work out? We’re running out of options, and Ryan has gotta graduate from high school. This has just gotta work…”
I nodded as my husband vented his worries. Yup. Our son has gotta graduate. Sure. Makes sense. It’s gotta happen.
And then he’s gotta go to college.
And then our daughter’s gotta go, too.
And they’ve both gotta start amazing careers.
And meanwhile, I’ve gotta keep growing my coaching business.
And my husband has gotta keep running his real estate business.
And we’ve all gotta work hard, check all the boxes, and do what’s correct and expected of us. Gotta gotta gotta. Forever.
Wait … what?

I felt a little spark in my body, like a static electric shock, snapping me back awake.
I looked my husband in the eye, took a deep breath and said:
“Online high school seems to be working for Ry, and that’s great. But if he doesn’t graduate on time, or if he gets a GED instead, or if drops out completely … so what?
We’ve raised a brilliant, unusual kid who doesn’t fit into the conventional school system — and probably won’t fit into a conventional career system, either.
He’s healthy and he’s smart and he’ll create the kind of life he wants, on his own terms. We taught him how to do that. And that’s ALL he’s GOTTA do.”
And for everybody reading?
The same goes for me — and for you.
Design a life that makes sense … for you.
Make the amount of money that makes sense … for you.
Take care of yourself and your kids in a way that makes sense … for you.
Get a job or move to a convent, buy a house or live on a commune, go to school or drop out of the system, go back to school or start your own business, start a clothing line or become a nudist, or some, all or none of the above …
Figure out what you want, why you want it and how to get it.
Without harming yourself (or anybody else) while you get it.
And THAT … is truly all you gotta do.

P.S. What’s one thing you’ve always thought you gotta do … that maybe you don’t?



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