August 6, 2017

Choose yourself.

A few months ago, I flew to NYC to celebrate my 10-year business anniversary. I was there for a secondary reason, too… I was hoping to attend meetings with publishers to discuss my new book, BARE.

It’s a book for women who want to stop dieting, stop obsessing over their bodies, and start feeling confident, strong, and comfortable in their skin. It’s a book that’s essentially a big “fuck you” to the diet industry—an industry that’s designed to keep women feeling inadequate and worthless. It’s a book that I want every woman and girl to own. But first (I told myself) I needed a six-figure book deal with a top-notch publisher.

My literary agent hustled her ass off—emailing, making calls, trying to line up a few meetings.

“Just get me in the room with someone,” I urged my agent. I knew if I could sit down with a publishing rep, I could dazzle and inspire them, and probably walk out of the room with a deal. All I needed was one meeting.

My agent tried. But nobody seemed interested in meeting with me. At least, not that week. Some publishers just didn’t “get” my book. Some liked the concept, but didn’t think I was “famous enough” and therefore the book wouldn’t be a financial success. Some were just too busy to meet. Others were out of town. Yada yada.

I’d rented an apartment in Chelsea for a few nights. I remember pacing around the apartment, feeling impatient and discouraged. Every time I checked my email, there’d be another disappointing message from my agent. “Sorry. Nothing yet. Still trying.”

There I was, waiting in NYC, rarin’ to go, ready to leap into a cab and zip to a meeting at a moment’s notice. And yet nothing was happening.

I felt like a teenage girl waiting by the phone, wishing and hoping that “the cute boy from biology class” would call to ask me out on a date. So much waiting and moping.

And then it dawned on me. 

“I don’t have to wait for anybody to choose me. I can choose myself.”

With that realization, my entire mood lifted. I practically bolted up to feet.

“Here I am in NYC,” I thought to myself. “I’ve got this gorgeous apartment for a few more days. I know a videographer here in town. I’ve already cleared my schedule. I’ve got free time to spare. I don’t have to sit around on my butt. I can use this time to do something productive.”

I took my book manuscript and broke it down into shorter pieces. Then I recorded a video inspired by each piece. Then I started building a new online community called BARE DAILY, filled with videos, podcasts, workouts, recipes, coaching sessions—all kinds of daily inspiration for women. I spent the rest of my time in NYC in full-on production mode, and I flew home on a total high, feeling so excited… even though I hadn’t gotten a single damn meeting.

80 days later, BARE DAILY was officially born. I hit my goal of getting 100 members during the initial sign-up period. AMAZING things are already happening inside the community. And I’m giving every BARE DAILY member a digital copy of my book.

The six-figure book deal that I wanted? I ended up creating it for myself.

That feeling I’d been chasing, that yearning to bring this message of empowerment into women’s lives, and make a difference? I created that feeling for myself, too.

I didn’t have to wait for a publisher to choose me. I chose myself.

Here’s what I’ve learned… Whatever you’re waiting around for (a book deal, a dinner party invitation, a big career opportunity, a hot date, a proposal) you don’t have to wait. 

If you want it, go get it. If crave it, create it. If you wish it existed, start it yourself. Instead of waiting for the phone to ring, pick up your laptop, your webcam, your guitar, your paintbrush, all of your tools and all of your heart… and create the future you want.

Take matters into your own hands. Don’t wait. Create. You’ll reach your goals 10x faster. And your life will never be the same.

P.S. There are still a few spots open for my Greece retreat in October. Check out the deets and reserve your spot here!



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